We'd been celebrating the sound of water entering a bucket full of holes.

That is half of private equity value creation, growth strategy, and board reporting in one line.

Leads up.
Traffic up.
Pipeline up.
“Engagement” up.
Everyone claps like seals because the top of the funnel looks busy.

Meanwhile conversion is awful, retention is weak, margins are leaking, the sales team is chasing rubbish, and the call centre is setting fire to money with both hands.

But yes, excellent news about the lead volume.

A lot of businesses are not growing.
They are just pouring harder into a broken system and mistaking noise for progress.

It is amazing what passes for momentum when nobody wants to look at the holes.

The holes are usually very boring:
slow speed to lead
bad follow up
poor close rates
pricing discipline of a drunk uncle
channel mix built on superstition
reporting designed to flatter rather than inform

This is why so many “growth plans” are really just spending plans in a nicer outfit.

More water does not fix the bucket.
It just gives you a louder sound while the floor gets wet.