events
On October 16th, Not Very Private Equity hosted an invite-only dinner at Chez Margeaux Members Club in New York. The evening brought together 10 senior private equity executives for an off-the-record discussion on the state of dealmaking, portfolio operations, and the realities of value creation in 2025. The event was
theses
Most people still treat divorce like a one-off legal event. But it’s not. It’s an industry. A massive one. And it’s ripe for a platform play. $50B+ is spent every year in the US alone across legal fees, mediation, financial restructuring, therapy, custody planning, moving house, selling
views
The format is almost predictable. Everyone goes around the table, venting: • “The deal team doesn’t listen.” • “The CEOs won’t follow through.” • “We don’t have real authority.” • “We’re treated like consultants on retainer.” Nods of sympathy, stories swapped, maybe even a war wound or two. And then
views
The sharp associate who spotted the hidden growth lever in diligence. The partner who intuitively backed a founder others passed on. The ops lead who made the 51/49 call and unlocked 3 turns of multiple. This was the game: pattern recognition, gut feel, reps. And it was a moat…
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Most roofing CEOs will tell you: “I run a roofing business.” The smart ones say something else entirely: “I run a sales and marketing business that happens to sell roofs.” That distinction is the difference between a $10m local contractor and a $500m platform. Because operations are table stakes. You
views
In business (and private equity especially), the danger isn’t always in the obvious losses. It’s in the near-wins. The times when you think you’ve got it wrapped up, only to watch it slip away through complacency, ego, or poor execution. I’ve seen deals where the thesis
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Most firms treat rainmakers like anomalies. The ones that last treat them like a strategy. Why? Because rainmakers aren’t just talented individuals, they create leverage. • A great fundraiser doesn’t just bring in capital once. They create durable LP relationships that fund multiple vintages. • A sourcing MD doesn’t
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But it is going to make large chunks of the industry look embarrassingly outdated. • Deal Sourcing: The average associate spends ~60% of their time sifting through teasers, scraping LinkedIn, and chasing bankers. An AI-driven sourcing engine can screen tens of thousands of businesses against an investment thesis in minutes. Pattern
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It sounds clever: neat pieces, predictable moves, a brilliant strategist “seeing 10 moves ahead.” But the problem is, chess is finite. You win, lose, or draw. Outcomes are immediate and visible. Once the king falls, it’s game over. That’s not business. Business is Go. In chess, the board
cases
By 2009, it was a $4.5B punchline. Overstocked. Overhyped. Over. The plastic clogs that took over every beach, hospital, and kid’s birthday party in the mid-2000s had fallen out of fashion hard. The stock dropped 75%. Retailers dumped inventory. Analysts declared the brand dead. Then something hideous happened…
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They’re the cotton candy of marketing metrics.....sweet for about 3 seconds, then you realise you’ve ingested air. Impressions don’t pay salaries. Clicks don’t cover debt covenants. Cash flow does. Customer LTV does. Gross margin does. Yet, I still see portfolio company boards patting themselves on
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But who are we actually serving? LPs, obviously. They give us the money. But portcos… they make us the money. So here’s the uncomfortable truth most GPs won’t say out loud: PE firms treat LPs like customers. But treat portcos like cost centers. You pitch the LPs. You